英文原文
I am currently preparing to work on a client project that uses transaction analysis (TA). My client uses it as a practical tool to help their people engage better. I am not new to TA, but it has been a while since I have used it in as much depth as my client does. As I re-immersed myself in TA, I realised what a useful tool it is and one that we all could benefit from. Transactional analysis is a psychoanalytical theory developed by Eric Berne in the 1950s. Transactions refer to the communication exchanges between people. It is an intellectual tool that helps us understand the basis of behaviour or feeling in communication and allows us to examine it and choose the way we want to respond. The communication typically consists of a stimulus by one person (the sender) and a response by another (the receiver). This in turn becomes a new stimulus for the sender to respond to. TA recognised that the human personality is made up of three ego states: the parent, the adult, and the child. Each of which is an entire and consistent system of thought, feeling, and behaviour from which we interact with each other. The Parent, Adult, and Child ego states and the interaction between them form the foundation of transactional analysis theory. The three states exist in all of us. They are recordings in the brain of actual experiences of internal and external events – with the first five years of life signifying the most important years. The Parent This is everything we learned from our parents in our first five years of life. It is the thoughts, feelings, and behaviours we ‘borrowed’ from our parents or caregivers. Some of the ‘how tos’ that we practice today form our parent data. The parent ego state can be further divided into 2 functions: the nurturing parent and critical parent. The nurturing is soft, loving and permission-giving. Whilst the critical parent holds our dos and don’ts. The rules for living, feeling, behaving, and believing from our parents. As you can imagine, some of the messages we hold in the parent ego state can be helpful whilst other messages not. (Note: you don’t have to be a parent to use the parent ego state) The Child If the parent ego state is represented by the recordings of data of external events, there is another set of recordings happening simultaneously. This is the internal events, the responses of the child to what we hear and see. In early life, the child has no vocabulary, most of their reactions are feelings. So, when a person is in a grip of feelings, the child ego state takes over. All our thoughts and emotions from our childhood days form our present-day memories and experiences. Our childlike ways can appear later in life. Bringing the same childhood feelings today that we felt back then. The child ego state can be divided into 2 parts: the free child and adapted child. The free child experiences the world spontaneously and directly. The adapted child is part of our personality that has learned to comply with our parental messages we received growing up. The Adult The adult ego state is our data processing centre. It is the part of our personality that can process data accurately using our senses and thinking. Problem-solving is based on the facts and not solely on preconceived thoughts and ideas or childlike emotions. The adult ego state data is accumulated from the child’s ability to discern the difference between the taught (parent), felt (child) concepts of life. The adult concept develops through thought based on data gathered and processed. The principal role of the adult ego state consists of validating or invalidating old data, discerning new data, and refiling it for future use. A basic parent-child transaction So, how do we know which ego state we are using in our transactions? There are several ways to tell which ego state we or someone else is using. Usually through the tone of voice, choice of words, emotional state, or way of being, body posture, and gestures. If soft and soothing, the sender is probably in a nurturing parent ego state. If the tone is harsh, disapproving or threatening, then the sender is probably in a critical parent ego state. An even, controlled and clear tone of voice usually implies the adult ego state. A free child tends to have an emotion-laden tone of voice. And the adapted child may either whine or conform, behaving as what is expected of them. Similarly, gestures, choice of words, body posture can signify which state we are using. The Parent typically warns or wags their finger with stern facial expressions – seeking to be understood. The Adult has more thoughtful expressions, often nods their head in agreement with contemplative facial expressions – seeking to understand. The child is more expressive both physically and emotionally. Typically, one of excitement with more noticeable gestures – seeking. I will stop here this week. Next week I shall continue with analysing transactions and where dissonance can occur and how to navigate it. Until then, I invite you to analyse your daily transactions to discern your ego states. Is there an ego state that you use more? As always, you can reach me at yoga@yoganesadurai.com
中文翻译
我目前正在准备一个使用沟通分析（TA）的客户项目。我的客户将其作为一种实用工具，帮助员工更好地参与。我对TA并不陌生，但已经有一段时间没有像我的客户那样深入使用它了。当我重新沉浸于TA时，我意识到它是一个多么有用的工具，我们所有人都可以从中受益。沟通分析是由埃里克·伯恩在20世纪50年代发展起来的精神分析理论。交易指的是人与人之间的沟通交流。它是一个智力工具，帮助我们理解沟通中行为或感受的基础，并允许我们检查它并选择我们想要回应的方式。沟通通常包括一个人的刺激（发送者）和另一个人的回应（接收者）。这反过来又成为发送者回应的新刺激。TA认识到，人类人格由三种自我状态组成：父母、成人和儿童。每一种都是一个完整且一致的思维、感受和行为系统，我们通过它们相互互动。父母、成人和儿童自我状态以及它们之间的互动构成了沟通分析理论的基础。这三种状态存在于我们所有人中。它们是我们大脑中实际经历的内外部事件的记录——生命的前五年是最重要的年份。父母自我状态这是我们生命前五年从父母那里学到的一切。它是我们从父母或照顾者那里“借用”的思维、感受和行为。我们今天实践的一些“如何做”形成了我们的父母数据。父母自我状态可以进一步分为两种功能：养育型父母和批判型父母。养育型是温柔、充满爱意和给予许可的。而批判型父母则持有我们的行为准则。来自父母的生活、感受、行为和信仰的规则。正如你可以想象的，我们在父母自我状态中持有的一些信息可能是有帮助的，而其他信息则不然。（注意：你不必是父母才能使用父母自我状态）儿童自我状态如果父母自我状态由外部事件数据的记录代表，那么还有另一组记录同时发生。这是内部事件，儿童对我们所见所闻的反应。在早期生活中，儿童没有词汇，他们的大部分反应是感受。因此，当一个人被感受所控制时，儿童自我状态就会接管。我们童年时期的所有思维和情感形成了我们现在的记忆和经历。我们孩子气的方式可能在以后的生活中出现。将我们当时感受到的相同童年感受带到今天。儿童自我状态可以分为两部分：自由儿童和适应儿童。自由儿童自发而直接地体验世界。适应儿童是我们人格的一部分，它学会了遵守我们在成长过程中收到的父母信息。成人自我状态成人自我状态是我们的数据处理中心。它是我们人格的一部分，可以使用我们的感官和思维准确处理数据。解决问题基于事实，而不仅仅是基于先入为主的思维和想法或孩子气的情绪。成人自我状态的数据积累自儿童区分被教导（父母）和感受（儿童）生活概念的能力。成人概念通过基于收集和处理数据的思维发展。成人自我状态的主要作用包括验证或无效化旧数据、辨别新数据，并重新归档以供未来使用。一个基本的父母-儿童交易那么，我们如何知道我们在交易中使用哪种自我状态？有几种方法可以判断我们或他人正在使用哪种自我状态。通常通过语调、用词选择、情绪状态、行为方式、身体姿势和手势。如果语调柔和舒缓，发送者可能处于养育型父母自我状态。如果语调严厉、不赞成或威胁，那么发送者可能处于批判型父母自我状态。平稳、控制和清晰的语调通常意味着成人自我状态。自由儿童往往带有情感丰富的语调。而适应儿童可能要么抱怨要么顺从，按照期望行事。同样，手势、用词选择、身体姿势可以表明我们正在使用哪种状态。父母通常用严厉的面部表情警告或摇动手指——寻求被理解。成人有更多深思熟虑的表情，经常点头表示同意，带着沉思的面部表情——寻求理解。儿童在身体和情感上更富有表现力。通常，兴奋时会有更明显的手势——寻求。本周我将在这里停止。下周我将继续分析交易以及不和谐可能发生的地方以及如何应对。在那之前，我邀请你分析你的日常交易，以辨别你的自我状态。你更常使用哪种自我状态？一如既往，你可以通过yoga@yoganesadurai.com联系我。
文章概要
本文介绍了沟通分析（TA）理论，特别是三种自我状态（父母、成人、儿童）及其在亲子互动中的应用。文章强调了成人自我状态作为数据处理中心的重要性，它基于事实解决问题，并讨论了如何通过语调、用词和手势识别自我状态，以促进更好的沟通。
高德明老师的评价
用12岁初中生可以听懂的语音来重复翻译的内容：这篇文章讲的是我们每个人心里都有三个小角色：一个是像爸爸妈妈那样教我们规矩的“父母角色”，一个是像小孩子那样凭感觉做事的“儿童角色”，还有一个是像科学家那样冷静思考的“成人角色”。在亲子互动中，如果我们多用“成人角色”来想问题，就能更好地理解对方，减少吵架，让家庭更和谐。
TA沟通分析心理学理论评价：从沟通分析心理学理论来看，本文精准阐述了自我状态的概念，特别是成人自我状态在亲子互动中的核心作用。成人自我状态作为理性处理中心，能够整合父母和儿童状态的信息，促进基于事实的沟通，这体现了TA理论中“我好-你好”的生活立场，有助于建立健康的互动模式。文章通过具体例子，如语调识别，生动展示了理论应用，强化了TA的实用价值。
在实践上可以应用的领域和可以解决人们的十个问题：在实践上，成人自我状态的应用领域广泛，包括家庭教育、职场沟通、心理咨询、团队建设、冲突调解、个人成长、情绪管理、亲子关系改善、教育辅导和社交技能提升。它可以解决人们的十个问题：1. 减少亲子冲突，通过理性对话替代情绪化反应；2. 提升职场效率，基于事实决策而非偏见；3. 改善夫妻关系，避免旧模式重复；4. 增强自我觉察，识别并调整不当行为；5. 促进儿童教育，用成人状态引导而非控制；6. 缓解焦虑，通过数据处理减轻情绪负担；7. 加强团队合作，鼓励成人间的平等交流；8. 提升沟通效果，避免误解和防御；9. 支持心理康复，整合过去经验；10. 培养领导力，以成人状态激励他人。