英文原文
Transactional Analysis [TA] introduces the fascinating concept of the 3 ego states in us: Parent, Adult & Child. While TA is used extensively in relationship therapy, it is a powerful and potent tool for improvement of leadership. The ‘Parent’ ego state has a positive side and a negative side. The positive side is nurturing and protective. The negative side is uses fear and force to control and is cynical. The ‘Child’ ego state also has a positive and negative side. The positive side is fun loving and carefree and the negative side is being a victim, looking for approval and whining. The ‘Adult’ state is the more mature, rational, long term, restraining and professional. TA therapist recommend that we should develop an adult value system and be in that ego state as much as possible for more healthy relationships. Creator of TA Eric Berne in his book ‘Games People Play’ illustrate how two individuals get into a pattern of behaviour and continue to be in that pattern. These are referred to as ‘Games people play’. There are many games and they will continue if they are complimentary even though they may not be productive or healthy. Let’s see how the ‘Adults’ ego state helps better leadership. This is a conversation between ‘Tom’ and his manager ‘Joe’. * Tom: Joe I have been in this job for 4 years and I am still at the same level. I feel I can take on more responsibility and add more value to the company. [Tom’s Adult state is communicating to Joes Adult state]., * Joe can respond in any of the 3 ego states;, * Let’s see what his ‘Parent’ ego state response to Tom’s ‘Child’ ego state will sound like and the ensuing conversation.Joe: Tom you are stuck in your position because of your poor attitude and performance, you will never be able to progress in this company.Now Tom can respond in any of the 3 ego states;Tom: Joe, just because you have been stagnant in your job for the last 6 years, don’t expect me to be the same [Tom’s ‘Parent’ to Joe’s ‘Child’].Tom: Joe, If I can specifically know areas in which I need to improve and if you give me some clear objectives to achieve in the next 6 months, I can work on them so that you can change your mind about my potential [Tom’s ‘Adult’ to Joes ‘Adult’].Tom: Joes, I have been really trying and you only find what’s wrong with me [Tom’s ‘Child’ to Joe’s ‘Parent’].This shows how productive an adult-to-adult conversation is and how anyone can go int an adult mode and make the conversation productive., * Let’s see what his ‘Child’ ego state response to Tom’s ‘Parent’ ego state will sound like and the ensuing conversation.Joe: Tom, its not only you. I have also been stuck in this position for 6 years. What ever I do my boss does not appreciate what I do. Nothing will change until my boss leaves this company.Now Tom can respond in any of the 3 ego states;Tom: Joe, don’t worry, as long as I am in this team you will be secure in your job. Let’s show him what we can do [Tom’s ‘Parent’ to Joe’s ‘Child’].Tom: Joe, showing good results will be the only solution. Lets get the team together and come up with a plan to turn around our division. We got a great team lets bring them together. [Tom’s ‘Adult’ to Joes ‘Adult’].Tom: Joes, you are only saying this to pacify me and brush off my issue. You will never look into my welfare [Tom’s ‘Child’ to Joe’s ‘Parent’].This also shows how productive an adult-to-adult conversation is, how even a more senior person in the relationship can go into a ‘child’ state and how anyone can go into an adult mode and make the conversation productive., * Let’s now see what his ‘Adult’ ego state response to Tom’s ‘Adult’ ego state will sound like and the ensuing conversation.Joe: Tom, our division has been missing our targets over the last 2 years. I am unable to recommend a promotion with these numbers.Now Tom can respond in any of the 3 ego states;Tom: Joe, but Jack working in the ‘Retail’ team got a promotions this year and that department is also not doing well. You are just giving excuses because of your inability to convince your boss. [Tom’s ‘Parent’ to Joe’s ‘Child’].Tom: Joe, that makes sense. We can’t expect promotions with poor performance. Lets get the team together and come up with a plan to turn around our division. [Tom’s ‘Adult’ to Joes ‘Adult’].Tom: Joes, but everyone is working hard and I know you can show what I do to your boss and get me my promotion. [Tom’s ‘Child’ to Joe’s ‘Parent’].This also shows how productive an adult-to-adult conversation is and how anyone can go into an adult mode and make the conversation productive., * As you see this conversation can go in many directions based on the ego states selected by each of the party in the conversation at any point in the conversation., Managers may take any of the ego states due to; * Their nurturing an upbringing, * What they have learnt to be effective observing their bosses [past or present], * The organizational culture, * What’s’ going on in their life at any given juncture, * The relationship with the team member, * Own performance, * Team members performance, * Personal dreams and aspirations., However as evident by this example, it is the ‘Adult’ state that makes leadership more effective and developing an adult ‘value’ system and developing an ‘adult’ mode of communication becomes paramount.
中文翻译
沟通分析心理学引入了三个自我状态的有趣概念：父母、成人和儿童。虽然沟通分析心理学广泛用于关系治疗，但它也是提升领导力的强大工具。父母自我状态有积极和消极两面，积极面是养育和保护，消极面是用恐惧和强制控制并愤世嫉俗。儿童自我状态也有积极和消极两面，积极面是爱玩和无忧无虑，消极面是成为受害者、寻求认可和抱怨。成人自我状态更成熟、理性、长远、克制和专业。沟通分析治疗师建议我们发展成人价值体系，并尽可能处于这种自我状态以建立更健康的关系。沟通分析创始人埃里克·伯恩在《人们玩的游戏》一书中说明两个人如何陷入行为模式并持续其中，这些被称为“人们玩的游戏”。有许多游戏，如果它们互补，即使不高效或不健康，也会继续。让我们看看成人自我状态如何帮助更好的领导力。这是“汤姆”和他的经理“乔”之间的对话。 * 汤姆：乔，我在这份工作干了4年，还在同一级别。我觉得我能承担更多责任，为公司增加更多价值。[汤姆的成人状态与乔的成人状态沟通]。 * 乔可以用三种自我状态中的任何一种回应； * 让我们看看他的父母自我状态对汤姆的儿童自我状态的回应听起来如何以及随后的对话。乔：汤姆，你卡在职位上是因为你态度和表现差，你永远无法在这家公司进步。现在汤姆可以用三种自我状态中的任何一种回应；汤姆：乔，就因为你过去6年工作停滞不前，别指望我也一样[汤姆的父母对乔的儿童]。汤姆：乔，如果我能具体知道需要改进的领域，如果你给我一些明确的目标在未来6个月实现，我可以努力，这样你可以改变对我潜力的看法[汤姆的成人对乔的成人]。汤姆：乔，我一直在努力，你只找我的错[汤姆的儿童对乔的父母]。这显示了成人对成人对话多么高效，以及任何人如何进入成人模式使对话高效。 * 让我们看看他的儿童自我状态对汤姆的父母自我状态的回应听起来如何以及随后的对话。乔：汤姆，不只是你。我也卡在这个职位6年了。无论我做什么，我的老板都不欣赏。直到我老板离开公司，什么都不会改变。现在汤姆可以用三种自我状态中的任何一种回应；汤姆：乔，别担心，只要我在这个团队，你的工作就安全。让我们展示我们能做什么[汤姆的父母对乔的儿童]。汤姆：乔，展示好结果是唯一解决方案。让我们把团队聚在一起，制定计划扭转我们部门。我们有一个伟大的团队，让我们把他们聚在一起。[汤姆的成人对乔的成人]。汤姆：乔，你只是说这个安抚我，敷衍我的问题。你永远不会关心我的福利[汤姆的儿童对乔的父母]。这也显示了成人对成人对话多么高效，即使关系中更资深的人如何进入儿童状态，以及任何人如何进入成人模式使对话高效。 * 现在让我们看看他的成人自我状态对汤姆的成人自我状态的回应听起来如何以及随后的对话。乔：汤姆，我们部门过去2年一直未达目标。我无法推荐晋升，基于这些数字。现在汤姆可以用三种自我状态中的任何一种回应；汤姆：乔，但杰克在零售团队工作今年晋升了，那个部门也表现不佳。你只是找借口，因为你无法说服你的老板。[汤姆的父母对乔的儿童]。汤姆：乔，这有道理。我们不能期望表现差还晋升。让我们把团队聚在一起，制定计划扭转我们部门。[汤姆的成人对乔的成人]。汤姆：乔，但每个人都在努力工作，我知道你能向你的老板展示我的工作并帮我晋升。[汤姆的儿童对乔的父母]。这也显示了成人对成人对话多么高效，以及任何人如何进入成人模式使对话高效。 * 如你所见，这个对话可以根据对话中各方在任何点选择的自我状态走向许多方向。管理者可能采取任何自我状态，由于； * 他们的养育和成长， * 他们从观察老板[过去或现在]学到的有效方式， * 组织文化， * 他们生活中任何时刻发生的事情， * 与团队成员的关系， * 自身表现， * 团队成员表现， * 个人梦想和抱负。然而，如这个例子所示，成人状态使领导力更有效，发展成人价值体系和成人沟通模式变得至关重要。
文章概要
本文基于沟通分析心理学理论，探讨了成人自我状态在团队建设和领导力提升中的应用。文章介绍了父母、成人和儿童三种自我状态的特点，并通过汤姆与经理乔的对话示例，展示了不同自我状态互动如何影响沟通效果。强调成人自我状态能促进理性、高效的对话，有助于解决团队冲突、提升绩效和培养健康的工作关系。结合关键词“成人自我状态在团队建设练习中”，文章突出了在团队活动中培养成人价值体系和沟通模式的重要性。
高德明老师的评价
用12岁初中生可以听懂的语音来重复翻译的内容：这篇文章讲的是我们心里有三种状态，就像爸爸妈妈、小朋友和大人一样。爸爸妈妈状态有时候会照顾人，但有时候会凶巴巴；小朋友状态爱玩，但有时候会哭闹；大人状态最棒，会冷静思考、讲道理。在团队里，如果大家都用大人状态说话，就像汤姆和乔那样好好商量，就能一起解决问题，让团队变得更好。所以，在团队游戏或活动中，练习用大人状态沟通很重要哦！
TA沟通分析心理学理论评价：本文精准运用了沟通分析心理学的核心概念，如自我状态（父母、成人、儿童）和互补交易，来解析领导力互动。它强调了成人自我状态在促进健康沟通中的关键作用，这与伯恩的理论一致，即成人状态基于现实和理性，能减少心理游戏和冲突。文章通过对话示例生动展示了不同自我状态组合如何导致不同结果，突显了成人对成人交易的效率，这体现了沟通分析在实践中的实用价值，有助于提升团队动态和领导效能。
在实践上可以应用的领域和可以解决人们的十个问题：应用领域包括职场领导力培训、团队建设活动、冲突调解、组织发展、人际关系改善、教育辅导、家庭沟通、心理咨询、社区服务和自我成长。可以解决的问题：1. 团队内部沟通不畅导致的效率低下；2. 管理者与下属之间的权力斗争和误解；3. 员工因缺乏认可而产生的消极情绪；4. 团队目标未达成时的互相指责；5. 个人在职场中感到停滞不前的挫败感；6. 组织文化中存在的负面互动模式；7. 跨部门合作中的协调困难；8. 家庭或社交关系中的争吵和冷战；9. 个人自我价值感低和依赖他人认可；10. 在压力情境下难以保持理性和专业态度。